For whatever reason, meditation has been really helping me clear my mind and get a better perspective on things. For a while, I’ve been struggling with a “victim mindset” – that I’d be happier at work if the culture were more diverse (feeling a bit lonely as the only female engineer on a ~20 person team), or if I had a better project (gridlocked by acquisition/office politics).
Over the past few days, I’ve started to see things differently… sure, there are definitely challenges to being a minority in the workplace, but I’m part of all kinds of diverse communities outside of work. In fact, I could even build stronger relationships with my coworkers if I took initiative to reach out to them instead of lamenting that they don’t include me. And yes, my project is gridlocked, but I can always approach more senior engineers for feedback and iterate on what I already have. Originally, I was concerned that they’d “go easy” on me (since I know they were too afraid to give feedback to other engineers), so I decided to point out specific areas of concern I had and the alternatives I considered. I’m really happy because I ended up with a lot of great comments and learned new ways to improve my work!